10 tips to stop caring about what other people think

It is time to finally stop caring about what other people think.

Stop stepping back because you are afraid somebody will think you’re silly.

Stop staying quiet because of the fear of not being accepted or understood.

Start living your own life and stop living for others.

Stop minding their thoughts.

Note: This is the second part in a two part series. Find the first part called “9 reasons why you should stop minding other people’s thoughts” here. Nevertheless, this part of the series also works perfectly on its own.

All you should mind is your very own business.

Trust me, you’ll feel a whole lot better, and you won’t regret not caring about what other people think of you. Read on to learn how to finally stop caring about what other people think.

How to break the habit of caring about what other people think.

So, we have to start somewhere, so let’s start now, today, this very moment and let’s do a little analysis of your situation. You first must identify in which area of your life you are holding back because of other people’s thoughts.

Analyze your behavior

To change anything, you first must find out what you actually need to change. So the first step is to analyze whose thoughts you care about and when and in which situations you do.

So grab a notebook and a pen, and prepare for some deep analysis.

Write down:

• the people you care about
• the people you are involved and need to get on with (your boss, for example)
• a random person you met/saw today (the bus driver, the old lady in the bus, the stranger who smiled at you in the coffee shop)

Now write down an answer to these questions for each person:

• Why do I care what he or she thinks about me?
• What would happen if I stopped caring?

After writing down your thoughts, read on.

The people you care about

It is normal to want to be liked by the people you care about. But important to know is that those people should not have the power to decide over your fate. No matter if it’s your parents that want you to get a specific degree or job, if it’s your partner who expects something from you, or your friends who are mad when you can’t come to a meet-up.

Those people love you, and they still love you when you don’t do what they expect from you. And if they don’t, then it’s time to say goodbye, because you don’t need that type of people in your life that expect you to live for them. It is your life, and YOU are your own master.

The people you have to be involved with

I understand that you care about what your boss thinks. But if you keep worrying about what he thinks, you’re most likely to work less good BECAUSE you care so much.

Let me tell you a little story about that.

I worked at a bakery some time ago and I could never get rid of the feeling that my boss did not like me. So I tried hard to show her what good of a worker I am. I ended up being so stressed to perform that whenever she was around, I completely messed up. Like, I completely failed to crack an egg!

After two months, I was fired. I don’t quite know why exactly, but she really made a point that by no means the reason was personal. Which made me believe it was personal. However, I managed to not take it personal. I concluded that it just did not fit and it was just not meant to be, and I’m fine with it.

Conclusion:

• In my fear of her thoughts, I performed worse.
• In the end, I got fired, no matter my worries.
• I think she just did not like me. It was not smart to try to impress her nevertheless.
• I’m glad I am out of this toxic environment

What did I learn?

Always just be yourself and don’t try to impress anyone. Some people are going to like you, others are going to dislike you. If they don’t value you, they’re not the right people. If your boss is thinking bad about you, then it’s his problem, not yours. And if he treats you bad as a consequence, you need to get out of there. And it’s like this for every person you have to be involved with.

Random people/strangers you don’t know

Think of an example in your past when you had the idea of doing something, but ended up not doing it because you talked yourself out of it.

This may be dancing to the music of the street musician that really got you grooving, which you didn’t do because you thought people would laugh and think you’re crazy.

Or speaking up in a meeting and telling the colleagues about your great idea, which you didn’t, because you were unsure anybody was going to like it.

What if?

Now I normally say that we should not think in “what if’s”, but now do that once, please.

Ask yourself: What if I had NOT thought of what was going on in people’s mind and had just danced like crazy? Wouldn’t that have been so much fun? Would maybe somebody have joined in and I would have met someone as crazy as me?

What if I had spoken out my idea in that meeting? Maybe my boss would have liked it and I would have gotten a raise?

Fact is, you’ll never know. Because you just didn’t dance or speak; you missed the experience, you missed the chance, because you were concerned about something you can’t even know. And now you’re here, maybe regretting, maybe not, dealing with the fact that you kept yourself small that day.

Conclusion: You missed a chance. You missed an experience, a memory to remember. What did you get? Nothing but regrets.

Now I’ll give you 9 tips about how to stop caring about what other people think.

10 tips to stop caring about what other people think

1. Invest in your self-love

Why are you listening to others? Maybe because you don’t like to listen to yourself or don’t think you’re right? But think of it like this: Why should anybody else’s opinion ever be relevant for your happiness? Your life, your business. So know that your own thoughts are the only thing that matters, and if you make your own thoughts consist of worry and negative self-talk, you can imagine where that leads to.

Browse my posts about self-love here.

2. Use the 5-second-rule

This is a tool I recently read about. It was found by Mel Robbins to get herself out of bed in the morning without snoozing. It is a so-called “starting ritual” to get you to start and just DO IT, without sparing a second thought to what people are going to think. You count 5-4-3-2-1 and do whatever you want or need to do without thinking.

Check out Mel Robbins book “The 5 second rule”

3. Reconnect with yourself

Once you’re into the habit of minding other people’s thoughts, you have most likely lost connection to what you truly want for yourself and what you want because somebody else wants it. So now’s the time to reconnect with yourself and find out what you truly desire. Find more help in this post.

Trust yourself

Connect to yourself and trust in you and in life, because then you won’t need so many other opinions and you will be your own shoulder to lean on. Learn more here.

Let go of the wrong people

Toxic people will always like to make fun of you, no matter what you do and no matter if you care or not. Decide to get rid of them and let go, because you don’t need to waste time trying to prove them wrong.

Affirmations

Here are some affirmations for you to repeat on a daily basis:

• I live for myself and I find my way.
• Other people’s opinions don’t hold me back.
• I am being my most authentic me.
• I love myself and I don’t need to care about what other’s think.

Meditation

Meditation is a great tool to gain control over your thoughts -just like I talk about in 9 ways to stop the overthinking– so it can help you to become more aware of your worries about other people’s thoughts and then clear them out.

Decide to live for yourself

It’s a simple decision: This is your life, and you are not going to waste it living it for somebody else.

You only have one life; decide to live YOUR life in accordance to YOUR desires and stop caring about what other people think!

Their problem, not yours

If somebody else has a problem with you, it is not your responsibility to solve that problem for them.

If somebody spends their life time with talking bad about you or thinking about you in a bad way, they have to deal with their toxic energy, not you.

Think big

There are over 7.7 billion people in this world. Among those 7.7 billion, there will be those who like you and those who don’t like you. If somebody doesn’t, there still are 7.7 billion others to choose from.

You can make your own way in between those 7.7. billion, and the right people will enter your life if you are your best and authentic self.

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To stop caring about what other people think you first must find out why you care and think about what would happen if you stopped.

Nothing bad would happen! You maybe even MISS a huge opportunity!

Then, there are different tips that I gave you today: Love and trust yourself more, connect with yourself, try meditation and affirmations, decide to live for yourself, think from another perspective, decide it’s not your problem and let go of the wrong people. Also, try the 5 second rule to shut your thoughts off when you have to!

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I hope my tips are helpful for you to stop caring about what other people think. Know that I am a work in progress as well, so I’m not an expert, but these tips are what have helped me before. I’d love to hear your feedback in the comments!

Love,