How to identify limiting beliefs

Limiting beliefs will hold you back forever if you don’t learn to identify and get rid of them. Also, the longer you keep them, the harder they will be to let go off. So to avoid being stuck with them forever, you must start to change them NOW, so that you can start living up to your true potential and stop letting the wrong beliefs hold you back from reaching your goals and dreams! The first step to changing them is finding them. Let me help with my tips on how to identify limiting beliefs.

First, let us take a closer look at beliefs.

What are beliefs?

Beliefs are thoughts you’ve had often enough that you unawarely have adopted as beliefs in your unconscious mind. Your beliefs define your way of living. They define your reality, they are the lenses through which you see the world.

For example, you believe that the earth is round, and you trust that belief enough to enter an airplane. You believe that your friends are trustworthy, so you tell them your secrets.

What are limiting beliefs?

A limiting belief is a belief that sets some kind of limit and holds you back -often times without your awareness- from taking action.

For example, a common limiting belief is “I am not good enough”. It is quite obvious that that belief will hold you back from taking amazing opportunities. It is a belief that keeps you stuck.

How? It gives you a number of self-doubts in your everyday life that will talk you out of every new experience that you feel not “good enough” for.

Here are some more limiting beliefs that keep you from living your potential.

Important to know…

Beliefs are not necessarily true. You only believe them to be true. This means you can change them. But to do that, you must first become aware of your beliefs, notice that they are bullshit and then start to change them.

Limiting beliefs aren’t obvious…

Beliefs are unconscious and often hard to spot. Identifying limiting beliefs requires you to take a strict look at your behavior and your mood.

Whenever you feel any of the following ways, limiting beliefs may well be the reason for it:

• bad in general (for no particular reason)
• stuck
• lonely
• broke
• hopeless
• anxious
• depressed
• unloved
• insecure

Also, if you do any of these things, limiting beliefs may be in your way:

• Procrastination
• Binge watching netflix / binge eating etc
• Isolation at home
• Drugs
• …

Now here is what to do

Whenever you feel one of the above feelings or have one of the above behavior patterns, use this simple method to find out the reason.

I need you to ask yourself 5 questions.

5 questions to ask

1. Why am I feeling the way I do?
2. What am I thinking?
3. Why am I thinking this, where does that thought come from?
4. Is it true? Why?
5. What would happen if I dropped that thought?

Why do I feel the way I do?

Maybe you don’t know the answer to this question yet, and that’s okay. Usually, our mind will provide us with some sort of justification. Something like “I am just having a bad day.”, or “I didn’t sleep well.” That’s okay and normal, but to have results, we need to dig deeper.

Last weekend, I went to a big speaking event not far away from where I live. I had been invited by a friend of mine who I hadn’t known for very long. Also, I had never been on such an event before and I did not know anybody else but that one friend. I felt insecure that morning. I was afraid of what was coming.

What am I thinking?

Your thoughts define the way you feel, that’s why you need to observe your thoughts. For that, take some minutes for yourself to take a look at your thoughts in silence. What are you worrying about? Something that happened these days, something that is about to happen, your skills…? Try to find the exact thoughts you are currently having in your life.

If your thoughts consist of self-doubts, then they most definitely come from limiting beliefs. By self-doubts I mean thoughts like “I am not ready”, “I’m not the right person for this.”, “I can’t…” etc.

My head was full of thoughts like “I know nobody” and “am I going to fit in?” and “I will be the alien.” etc. Worry, worry, worry.

Why am I thinking this, where does this thought come from?

Is there any reason for you to be thinking what you are? What do you believe that makes those thoughts appear? Something from your past? (Like me? Read below!) Do you have a belief about yourself that creates those thoughts?

I was thinking the way I was thinking because I felt inferior, small and shy. Why? Because I knew from my past that I had always been a wallflower and that I had never been the type that makes new connections easily. I basically was stuck in my past and believed I was just a small, shy, inferior wallflower.

How wrong I was!

Is that thought true?

Of course you might want to shout yes, because you would not really lie to yourself, right? Well, take a closer look. Are those thoughts really true or are your beliefs making it feel true?

In my case, it definitely was not true. When I attended that event, those thoughts lingered for a little while, and in the beginning, I did not feel at ease. But after some time, I told myself “Fuck it” and I went for it. The result? I noticed that I ain’t no effing wallflower anymore. Those times are over! I made amazing new connections that day, and I had endless fun.

What would happen if I dropped that thought?

If you would stop thinking that thought, would it open or close a door? Would it help you to expand your limits? Would it feel like a relief? If that’s the case, that’s your limiting belief.

I actually dropped the thought of me being a wall flower during the event, and that’s when I opened up and got to know some amazing women. And afterwards, I felt empowered!

Some examples for limiting beliefs

Here are some examples of limiting beliefs:

• I am not good enough
• I will never change
• People are out to get me
• Success is not for me
• I am not ready
• People won’t like me
• Something is wrong with me
• Mistakes are bad
• Failures are a sign of weakness
• …

After you have identified your limiting beliefs, it is time to change them. For further information, I have found a great blog post by Tricy on designedforawesome.com to help you do that: 7 ideas to overcome limiting beliefs

I found a belief while writing this

As I was writing this post, I have been procrastinating and distracting myself a lot. I took my phone to browse social media, I did other things instead, I went to the toilet more often than necessary… and I kept complaining to my roommate that I’m having a bad day.

Then I realized the reason for my procrastination.

It is an unconspicious thought I was having, and it was telling me that I am writing bullshit. It’s whispering that I should not continue writing this post, because it is so bad and nobody will understand or even like what I am writing. People will shake their heads at my words.

The limiting belief behind it?

I am not good enough to write this blog.

And it is total BULLSHIT. Because I decide I am good enough, and there will always be people that will like it, and people that will hate it. Haters are gonna hate forever and I am only going to improve my writing by doing it.

So I am doing it anyway.

---

Thank you for reading, and please tell me what you think in the comments, so that I can improve my writing! Thank you!